The End of Everything

Tell us about life with your BX, or indeed life in general!
User avatar
docchevron
The Immoderate half of the admin team
Posts: 7524
Joined: Sun Jun 04, 2006 7:03 pm
Location: A Bucket of Fish
x 7

The End of Everything

Post by docchevron » Wed Jun 18, 2008 1:28 pm

Ok, so I thought rather than polluting everyone else's blogs with my diatribe, I'd start my own!
It may have some car stuff in it, but will no doubt mainly be me ranting about various things I feel like ranting about as and when the mood takes me.

First a disclaimer:
I am a terribly arrogant, foul mouthed know all with condescending tendencies.
If you are easily offended then I suggest you do not read on.

If you wish to take me to task on anything I write then thats fine, and you'll be secure in the knowledge that you are almost certainly right, and I am almost certainly wrong.
But if you read anything here and and are disgusted / sickened then dont bother to moan about it as you have been duly warned in advanced, although most of you know what I'm like anyway so it shouldn't hold too many surprises.

So, to start:
Smokes lots, because enough's enough already!

Far too many BX's, a bus, an ambulance a few trucks, not enough time and never enough cash...

User avatar
docchevron
The Immoderate half of the admin team
Posts: 7524
Joined: Sun Jun 04, 2006 7:03 pm
Location: A Bucket of Fish
x 7

Post by docchevron » Wed Jun 18, 2008 2:13 pm

Ok, actually I am going to kick off with car related matters, since it's probably about time I shared with you mere mortals what I've been up to over the last 10 months.
Actually it didn't take 10 months in total, other things kept getting in the way,including the winter weather.

Anyway, Last August a cow broke into my barn, an actual bovine cow thing.
It then took a dump on the bonnet of my mates CX Turbo and couldn't turn around to get out. So it kicked its way out through the side of my car.
Every panel on the O/S was destroyed, the rear O/S tyre was blown off the rim, the rear bumper was kicked off, and even the bonnet had suffered.

I never actually took any pictures of the initial damage, but set about battering the side out and bodging the bumpers sufficientley to make it usable.
Since the MoT was due I wheeled it in for test and passed with no advises.
A little happier about the stuation I returned the car to the shed, where it stayed until a couple of weeks ago.

First on the agenda was getting my own back on the cows...
Image
The irony was not lost on me that out of the 4 people that rent space there, I'm the only vegetarian.....
At one point we probably had more black P2's in stock than anywhere else in the country:
Image
Image
and of course ELF!


So then I started to dismantle the car, and found that actually the cow had probably done me a favour since it was rotten. Really rotten.
Image

Image

Image
Image
Image
Image
Image
Image

Image
Image
Image
Image
Image


So it was out with the MiG and many unhappy wintery, cold evenings losing the will to live:
Image
Image
Image

Image
This is the patch in the scuttle that turned into more work than I'd hoped, after the sound deadening in the void betweent he fire wall and bulkhead box section caught fire and damaged the loom behind the dash.
Ho hum...

Image

How A pillars should be repaired, not the usual 300 tonnes of weld blobs that look hidious...
Image

and shiny looking front end of the sill:
Image
Image

The bovined doors then become a thing of memory;
Image
Image

Then on we go to the back end of the sill:
Image
Image
Image

Inbetwixt a bit of repair on the B pillar:
Image

The onto the equally shagged N/S sill:
Image
Image
Image

The into the rear N/S wheelarch and the rather knackered outrigger:
Image

Then onto the rear valance:
Image

Then I got bored with welding and built the front end up:
Image
Image
Image
Image

Then Mr. MiG had to come out to play again:
Image
an exhaust hanger! The first time the cars had one in all the time I've owned it!

Image
Bit more plating round here then...

Then the cow battered 1/4 wing came off....OH DEAR...
Image
Image

Usual rot down the closing panel / door shut:
Image

and a bit of a hole in the wheelarch:
Image

which at least was nice and easy to sort:
Image

Bit more plating on the valance:
Image

Then I kinda carefully hacked a bit ofthe inner wing out of another BX and let it in to YGX:
Image
Image

and hacked another bit off the scrapper for the door shut:
Image
I know it looks rusty, but it isn't, it's just the remnants of the paint.

Then on with shiny black wing and side pod:
Image

On with the N/S sill skirts:
Image


and then I found even more rot...
Image
Image

The then the fuel tank and rear subframe fell out in me hand guvnor:
Image
Image
Image

So, after several years of repair patches underneath it looked a bit like this:
Image
and then some shiny new kunifer pipes went in followed by the tank and subframe:
Image

Then courtesy of DLM a proper front pipe goes in:
Image

and the O/S sill skirts get some acrylic undercoat:
Image

followed by refitting the genuine PSA back box, freshly painted and hanging on a proper hanger, and the fitment of the replacement rear bumper and BRAND NEW rear red pin strip (which cost ALOT)
Image

Then I turned my attention to the hydraulics, which despite the LHM only being 2 years old was filthy, and the filters were blocked, so a bit of a clean in the tank and the filters:
Image
Image

Then I made a fatal mistake.
Ran out of lacquer, so I dapped down to Halfrauds, as they doa clear acrylic lacquer. Jesus it's shite:
Image
Flat and milky.
After some 1200 grit and some G3 it looked ok though:
Image
Image


Then I moved on to the dash, the speedo had been dying for sometime, so I bought a new one, which wasn't cheap. What really pissed me off though was that the trip counter was broken. So I fixed that then swopped the mileage drum to retain the total:
Image

Obviousley every mechanical component was overhauled along the way and it's pretty much brand new underneath now.

The net result looks a bit like this, although I've since ditched the red grill for the original black one...
Image
Image
Image
Image

At the moment the whaletail is rubbed down ready for a respray (usual problem of lifting lacquer) and there's a few niggles to attend to, and a bit more painting round the back end, but all in all it worked out ok.
Smokes lots, because enough's enough already!

Far too many BX's, a bus, an ambulance a few trucks, not enough time and never enough cash...

User avatar
Philip Chidlow
Over 2k
Posts: 11570
Joined: Fri Oct 07, 2005 1:08 pm
Location: Chelmsford, Essex
x 15

Post by Philip Chidlow » Wed Jun 18, 2008 2:40 pm

=D> =D> =D> ^^bx>

Need I say more!

that reminds me, I must have roast beef again soon :D
• 1992 Citroen BX TZD Turbo Hurricane
• 2006 Xsara Picasso 1.6 16v

User avatar
toddao
BXpat
Posts: 2833
Joined: Fri Jan 12, 2007 5:01 pm
Location: The Hegau

Post by toddao » Wed Jun 18, 2008 2:49 pm

Very fine, cow induced work! When you re-built the sills, did you fabricate your own sections or are these available anywhere as replacement sections? I ask because.. chomp,chomp goes the rust in my area.
What actually did happen to the cow by the way?
Todd


this yellow writing is really hard to read

User avatar
mat_fenwick
Moderator
Posts: 7275
Joined: Tue Sep 20, 2005 4:08 pm
Location: North Wales
x 13

Post by mat_fenwick » Wed Jun 18, 2008 2:55 pm

toddao wrote:What actually did happen to the cow by the way?
Why, do you fancy a burger or 2(hundred)?

Top work Doc anyway!!!

M

Post by M » Wed Jun 18, 2008 3:08 pm

Glad to see you got the priorities right - cow first then car :twisted:
Top work.

Reminds me of that sketch with Hugh Laurie where he goes into a news agent and pulls some magazines up off the shelves and says, look at these, a marvel of modern advertising, in each one we have adverts for double glazing, stair lifts, life insurance and garden gnomes (shakes magazine and lots of inserts fall out ont o the floor) - then he turns to the cameara and says today we are going to find the man who was responsible for these adverts (picks up 12 bore) and shoot him....

I can just picture a similar scenario with the cow.....
Last edited by M on Wed Jun 18, 2008 3:49 pm, edited 1 time in total.

User avatar
toddao
BXpat
Posts: 2833
Joined: Fri Jan 12, 2007 5:01 pm
Location: The Hegau

Post by toddao » Wed Jun 18, 2008 3:44 pm

Mat wrote
Why, do you fancy a burger or 2(hundred)?
:D

I wasn't actually wondering as to the current whereabouts of the said animal but what actually terminated its peaceful life of grazing er.. car re-modelling.

Also, I don't do no cow. I'm a Hindu/ an atheist/ a Buddhist and a Jain.. as sung by Doner-van in his latest hit - Universal Soldier
Todd


this yellow writing is really hard to read

User avatar
jonathan_dyane
BXpert
BXpert
Posts: 975
Joined: Sat Feb 09, 2008 7:15 pm
Location: Liverpool

Post by jonathan_dyane » Thu Jun 19, 2008 1:38 am

Yay! Lovely, lovely job! The cow did not die in vain...

I noted your FG in the background; the father has an FG flatbed which is fun (but 'kin slow...)
"Boring damned people. All over the earth. Propagating more boring damned people. What a horror show. The earth swarmed with them." -Charles Bukowski

User avatar
docchevron
The Immoderate half of the admin team
Posts: 7524
Joined: Sun Jun 04, 2006 7:03 pm
Location: A Bucket of Fish
x 7

Post by docchevron » Thu Jun 19, 2008 2:52 am

toddao wrote: When you re-built the sills, did you fabricate your own sections or are these available anywhere as replacement sections? I ask because.. chomp,chomp goes the rust in my area.
What actually did happen to the cow by the way?
Well, alot of it was fabricated form sheet steel. but the end plates and wot not were hewn from another car.

Complete sills are still avaialble, but I have no idea if repair sections are.
To be fair it's simple construction so doesn't require much effort to form new ones from sheet.

The cow just kinda died. We went through a spell of lots of cows, and the odd sheep, snuffing it. DEFRA weren't concerned, so I guess it wasn't bluetongue, or BSE or owt....
Todd wrote:I'm a Hindu/ an atheist/ a Buddhist and a Jain
Thats quite a combination you got going on there dude!
I would be an atheist, but I dont believe in it!
Actually godly things is a subject I shall be issuing forth diatribe on soon....
jonathan dyane wrote:I noted your FG in the background; the father has an FG flatbed which is fun (but 'kin slow...)
I love that thing mate, I really do. I'd sell everything I own before she went.
Mine is rather rapid as it goes, it's got the 40E 110BHP high speed engine mated to a reworked Borg Warner Model 8 auto and high speed diff.
It needs a shed load of work now, although I used it everyday for a year.
The only drawback is that it goes wayhey better than it stops. 350FG brakes are bloody awful.
They work the first time you use them, after that, theres bugger all until they cool down!

I shall crack on with the old girl late next year I imagine, I actually really miss driving that.
FG's aint really about speed anyway, it's all about the journey!

I'm guessing your dads is the 2.2 diesel?
I'd bloody love to have a look at it, they are getting uber rare now.
I dont suppose he's on the yahoo FG group is he??
Smokes lots, because enough's enough already!

Far too many BX's, a bus, an ambulance a few trucks, not enough time and never enough cash...

User avatar
toddao
BXpat
Posts: 2833
Joined: Fri Jan 12, 2007 5:01 pm
Location: The Hegau

Post by toddao » Thu Jun 19, 2008 6:45 am

Hello? FG's - wot? Bit of clarification please - I've looked through the photos again and no sign of an FG. Well obviously I don't know what it is..
Todd


this yellow writing is really hard to read

User avatar
docchevron
The Immoderate half of the admin team
Posts: 7524
Joined: Sun Jun 04, 2006 7:03 pm
Location: A Bucket of Fish
x 7

Post by docchevron » Thu Jun 19, 2008 1:49 pm

Ok, look behind the BX, there's a big white / very dirty ambulance. Thats a British Leyland 350 FGA with Wadham Stringer coach work!
Image

They more usually looked like this:
Image
This one being a 420FG Tipper.
They were quite revolutionary at the time, the cab doors opened within the width of the cab, and they had kerblite windows to make parking / manuvering easier.

They are thin on the ground now, but they are the most fun you can have with your clothes on.

Mine was one of ten built for Swindon, whilst there were many more with the same body, and indeed there were some 420 FG's that had an extended version of the same body, I believe mine is the only auto ex swindon one in existence.
Smokes lots, because enough's enough already!

Far too many BX's, a bus, an ambulance a few trucks, not enough time and never enough cash...

User avatar
docchevron
The Immoderate half of the admin team
Posts: 7524
Joined: Sun Jun 04, 2006 7:03 pm
Location: A Bucket of Fish
x 7

A Rant....18 Cert...

Post by docchevron » Fri Jun 20, 2008 3:33 am

AND ANOTHER THING!



All the ensuing lawlessness and rapid downhill slide into abysmal that is taking place in Britain got me thinking about how this country is now totally fucked, and how it can be brought back to a true civilised society.



The following may seem extremley draconian, but I really do believe it is the only way this country can ever call itself "Great" again.

The other thing that occurs is that any benefits of this will only be seen in future generations, so whatever happened now, we will still be lumbered with "the useless generation" for at least another lifetime..

Anyhow, my thoughts go like this:

A dis-jointed, anti-social, apathetic society is the result of a lack of parenting, so, in future it should be made so that if you want to have children, you must be able to provide for your child, and prove that you are a capable person willing to educate your off-spring and raise them to be civilised. No more of this horseshit expecting the country to pay for your children and bring them up all because you like getting on your back.

If you cannot prove that you are able to financially and morally raise a child, you should be sterilised, and that applies to men aswell. No gender descrimination in my world.

Prisons clearly dont work. I'd bring back capitol punishment.

Anti-social behaviour should be dealt with strictly and rapidly. I suggest building Ghetto's, and throwing all the scumspawn infecting our society into them, give them nothing but bread and water, no TV, no fucking PSP's, and an immediate end to this "softly softly" politically correct bullshit. No-one stuck a gun to these arseholes heads and made them do drugs, they are weak pathetic scum, fuck being kind them, give them 3 months in "the ghetto" to sort themselves out, if after that they continue to be druggie scrotes, hang the fuckers. These bastard ferral bastards are a spurn to society, it MUST be stamped out.

Make social security much stricter. If you cant work for genuine reasons, no problem, the state will look after you "from the cradle to the grave" as was intended. But if you choose not to work because your a bone idle lazy bastard. Fuck you, you get no help. END, no exceptions.

If you find yourself unemployed for whatever reason and can prove that you really are looking for new employment, no problem. But if you're unemployed and make no effort to find work, again, fuck you. You dont deserve help if you wont help yourself.

All this legal shite that now means a drug dealing fucker can blatently sell drugs in the street and get away with it ends. Fuck the courts and juries, if you're a dealer and the police know you are (and lets face it, they DO know, they just do fuck all), then you get hanged. End.

Yob beahviour gets treated the same way, if your a yob, you get hanged.

What this bullshit country needs is REAL hard laws to control the populus that thinks they can do whatever the fuck they like.

Draconian it may be, but the "softly softly" approach as brought about by tree-hugging do-gooders has failed society as a whole by allowing the scum of the planet to ruin any civilised mentality the mass populus once held dear.

Extreme? Well maybe, but I do believe that the current mess that we find ourselves in is the sole result of people fucking around and not considering the consequences. It's the parents moral responsibility to instill a sense of decency into their children, it should also be the parents legal responsibility to do so.

If I was in charge of this country I reckon I could wipe a quarter off the population inside a year. That may be considered in the same vein as Saddam hussein or Pol Pot, but I can guarentee the country would be 1000 times more pleasant after that year.

Maybe thats what this country really needs, a person with a vision and bollocks, not afraid to speak for the decent people of the land, instead of standing up for the scum. More importantly, someone that will not just speak, but take action.
Smokes lots, because enough's enough already!

Far too many BX's, a bus, an ambulance a few trucks, not enough time and never enough cash...

User avatar
docchevron
The Immoderate half of the admin team
Posts: 7524
Joined: Sun Jun 04, 2006 7:03 pm
Location: A Bucket of Fish
x 7

Random Thoughts....

Post by docchevron » Fri Jun 20, 2008 3:37 am

Ever wondered why people in a relationship that clearly dont love eachother anymore carry on trying to give the impression that everythings ok at home?

I mean, why bother? you were in love, you aint anymore, move on, call it a day, and forget about eachother right?

Why do people feel the need to carry on a facade for their friends? Especially when it's fuckin' obvious to everyone anyway....



So, national conscription. It should be brought back I reckon, it would remove these drug taking bastard kids from the streets and give them discipline. Either they will become men, or, if they still behave like twats, use them as canon fodder. Job done. Whatever the outcome, things would improve for the rest of us.


Why are unemployed, drug taking people happy to sit on their arses all day, everyday and not do anything with their lives? Doesn't it get VERY fucking boring very quickley? I mean, everyday is EXACTLEY the same, why would anybody be happy to be stagnant?

How come it's kinda summertime here and yet it's still cloudy and pissing down with rain? Wheres all this global warming huh?

So, why is it that the people you care about most and want to help and be happy are often the most difficult people to help?

Why is it that you can meet someone and then drift away from them, and years later realise how useful that person would be to know right now..?

Fat people are harder to kidnap right?

Why is it that "middle England" is totally fucked off with the way this country has gone to hell in a handbasket, and is governed by selfish short term obsessed rat bastards, but do nothing about it?

So, how come the government keep coming up with lots of "idea's" to make things better, and spend shit loads of money on "think tanks" and shiny broucheres, and then announce these wonderful life changing proposals, and promptley quietly forget about them?



Ok, thats enough for now..
Smokes lots, because enough's enough already!

Far too many BX's, a bus, an ambulance a few trucks, not enough time and never enough cash...

User avatar
toddao
BXpat
Posts: 2833
Joined: Fri Jan 12, 2007 5:01 pm
Location: The Hegau

Post by toddao » Fri Jun 20, 2008 8:05 am

Still, mustn't grumble..


Smack/Crack FTW - takes away all pain, as promoted by that great artist Pete Dodgyteeth.

2012 will take care of all ills, they'll be no UK, USA, USSR etc. just a great big pretty ball of fire, so let's enjoy ourselves while we can! Crack anyone? :D
Todd


this yellow writing is really hard to read

M

Post by M » Fri Jun 20, 2008 9:18 am

toddao wrote: Smack/Crack FTW - takes away all pain, as promoted by that great artist Pete Dodgyteeth.
Half Man Half Biscuit wrote:I wonder why they dont bring back National Service and the Birch
Hmmmm, Working with smackheeeeeds all day long I have to say that:
Getting muntered :-
Image
IS the only way these people ever sold any records, earned a living and paid income tax....
Image

And why do MP's get to award themselves a noice fat shiny £10K pay rise and I get 3p? Bucking Fastards.